Teaching Kids Values is Parents’ Job
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The other day I read an article about parents up in arms about the increasing amount of trashy material on TV. They griped about why this commission or that board isn’t doing something about this. I read another article about a community torn about how to teach sex ed. Still other articles talked about the actions of community organizers to curb gang violence. As serious as these topics are, I had to laugh.
Why would I laugh at such a thing? Because somewhere along the line, our society got it into our heads that someone else was in charge of our kids’ moral development. We thought that it was just another thing we could outsource in our busy lives. "I’m doing all I can," we like to tell ourselves. "Darn that TV for showing my kid how to swear, cheat, and kill people."
I want to say it bluntly so there will be no mistake: parents are in charge of instilling values. It is not the job of a board, a teacher, a commission, the police department, the armed forces, or any other external organization. Studies have found repeatedly that children who receive consistent training in values are much more likely to adhere to and return to those values as they go through life.
Take me, for instance. I grew up East LA- not exactly Mayberry. In fact, gangs, drugs, promiscuity, and violence were rampant. And I do not use the word ‘rampant’ lightly. These things really were everywhere. It would have been easy for my parents to excuse themselves and say, "What can I do against influences like these?" It would have been easy for them to blame the schools or the media if we went bad.
But they stuck with it. They taught us right from wrong. When we did go wrong, they straightened us out really quick.
The result: not one of us ever took drugs or participated in gang activity. In fact, we all went on to get college degrees at top tier universities and have upstanding families of our own.
How did this happen? I can tell you it had nothing to do with what was on TV or what we saw at school. It was because of the tireless work of our parents.
It’s time we rethought our tendency to look for the media or government for moral guidance. The bottom line is, they are motivated by ratings and votes… period. It’s time we took responsibility for raising our kids squarely back into our hands.
